The month of April (2018) was a rollercoaster for me. Like the kind you don’t want to get back on, and you start examining your life decisions, and you hate the person who talked you into getting on.
Honestly I have been a little mad at God this past month. Mad in blindness, upset to not understand, yet with bitter trust and peace, thankful, that my God, the God, beyond what I think and feel has a loving purpose for things. If you remember that outlook from the start, you can appreciate the lows a lot better. Of course I love the sunny days best, but I have realized since He’s been with me I never see a dark night without stars!
God’s light and hope is always shining for His own. And that’s a gift, a marvel, that I cannot utterly complain against. It’s a relief. A foreshadow. God doesn’t have to be there, but He is. And it’s beautiful when you see Him.
There was family grieving. There was love. There was boldness and being faithful victories. Compromise and bad mistake decisions. New opportunities and clarity. I was sick all May 1st. Telling ya! April storms bring breakthroughs? Is that how it goes? lol I’m shook and hesitant almost, but the high of the peaks keeps me really excited even in some of that stuff. The good prevails!
I went to my first worship concert as well. Loved it! I’m such a cry baby when it comes to sweet moments. I thought about how some people are killed for associating with Christianity in some places. And I never understand that. Why kill your savior or your brothers or sisters? Then I realize that’s the thing… That perspective is unseen, because what they’re being taught about scripture or God’s people is not what scripture says or who God’s people are at all. A blind hatred and stereotype is raised in fear based on a lie. I know it’s a blessing to have that freedom out here. It was a little heaven on earth knowing people appreciated God and life and were on inspired journeys of eternal love. It could be like that for the world. We’re united. God is holy and a consuming fire, but He is also merciful and His sent Son, Jesus saves.
Whenever we have liberty, us believers should radically love everyone boldly and shamelessly with the Christ banner higher! That’s what kills the stigma! Be as radiant as you can. It’s a good thing! May truth win out.
About compromise. The enemy knows my sweet spot I swear. With all the lows this one hurt me most. The outside world is always falling apart, I hate that, but I’m not standing there. Don’t wreck my foundation with God though. Don’t divide me from Him with sin that’s so obviously against Him and shames the fact that I’m blood bought. I chose wrong. But I thank God for mercy that I get to make a second choice. It’s worse to not get back up. To wreck all that God has built because you wrecked apart of it. If God is in you? How can you sin against Him without sinning against yourself? Sin hurts. I felt the wreckage and the backtracking, and I’m avoiding that direction at all cost now. Following God closer.
You. Hi!
Wait for and follow God’s will too!
If ever what you thought His will was changes, then go that new direction without regret. We make mistakes. God is able to handle them and make peace of it. There is only peace with Him. Whoever walks with Him will be okay as life changes, and as you change. Plus, God’s people are going to want God’s best for you too. You’re not responsible for putting peace in places… that’s God’s spot and His ability alone. That’s why we need Him and encourage others to follow Him. So they can rest in places we could never hold them. I’m waiting on nothing else but God’s go or stop.
But also if ever or whenever He clarifies something to you. With pride and confidence listen also. Not looking at the obstacles or discouragement but keeping your eyes on the promise and the outcome with faith. It’s not as smooth as you like, I relate, but who says that’s the best way?
Be mad, be humorous be sincere about how you feel about all the hard places! Our emotions will respond in light of its limited points of views, but let your Spirit and it’s actions speak too! and even louder! with continued devotion, dependence and honor for Christ, knowing He’s working things together for the good of those that love and await Him. Some situations are truly terrible, and God’s not asking you to enjoy that, but to enjoy His heart in it. Remember you’ll get there! God finishes what He starts! He works while we wait, He’s moving as we move! Know Him deeper – know love deeper, know peace and joy deeper.
Watch His heart. Follow it and everything else will fall into place. His glory. Your redemption. The hope completed and the promises.
No faults recorded for His, just the joy. Seamless. Perfect. Not now, no.. but however it will be then.